I just want to like I’m wanted and that I’m good enough instead of feeling like a burden and that people only tolerate me
But at the same time, I can’t be with the person I want because of things that are out of my control
My mind is constantly against me since I have BPD
I mean she’s my best friend and I have strong feelings for her, but she’s double my age and she’s my half cousin’s mom (she is not my aunt by blood or marriage), so I know that I can’t be in a relationship with her
I can’t drink anymore because it makes my BPD worse
I don’t feel safe right now
I feel alone and that I’m going to lose the person closest to me